For the first time in … (thinks hard, comes up empty) … ages, I am going on a date!
Yeah (looking smug and victorious)!
Some guy thinks I am pretty, sexy and cool (licking lips oh so seductively) and has invited me on a thingamajig.
Problem (lip licking suddenly seeming gross and pointless): I don’t know what to say to him. I can write it down for him if he wants, but the words just won’t come out of my mouth.
Thankfully (seeing a light at the end of the tunnel), I just stocked up on new Wonder Bra. I’m hoping my cleavage and new Shape Your Ass jeans will distract him.
Oh well (turns out the light was a bus heading toward me at full speed) …